Monday, February 10, 2014

Oh what a difference life can be without hate in my heart!

I am writing this post with good news, there for a while I didn't think I would ever have good news in my life again.  Actually there for a while I really didn't think I deserved to live.  But my journey has became so much brighter. One morning during church I got an overwhelming feeling of peace come over me.  I realized at that moment that I no longer had hate in my heart for Daric's dad.  It was a great feeling.  Even though I will never become friends with him or anything of the such, I no longer stew over what he has put me through. Hate in your heart is so toxic.  It was controlling my life, I couldn't sleep and I constantly thought about all the hurt I had been put through.  I am happy to report that I have been able to sleep through the night for several months, I have been taken off one of my depression medications, and I now only see my therapist once a month and my Psychiatrist every 2 months. Talk about progress!!  I have also been released to work again so I take my CNA written exam this week and will be going to work by the end of the month.  If you would have asked me a year ago if I thought I would be feeling this good I would've said "No, I will never feel better and my life will always suck"  I get to have Daric every other weekend and he contacts me usually on a daily basis. We have a blast when its our weekend to have him and we have been getting along great.  I am actually excited about life again and looking forward to my future.  I do not believe life has fairy tale endings nor do I believe that life will always be happy and easy but for now I will just say stay tuned and to be continued......

1 comment:

  1. This post warms my heart and brings tears to my eyes, Chrissy!!! I am soooo happy for you! Happy that through God you were able to let go of the anger and focus on the beautiful things in your life. You are an amazing woman with so much to look forward to. I am blessed to have you as my friend!